Life Lessons

PC @Amritha Jan

Scenario 1
Then..
(The 1990's)

Me: *Huffing and panting entering home in my blue sports tee and shorts. I looked BEAU-TI-FUL. Fully drenched, the shoe laces untied, slimy hands and feet, scruffy unkempt hair and a few scratches on my right knee and elbow. Hmmm... Din't I say BEAU-TI-FUL? (Well.. playing football in the rain compliments you with all those uninvited add-ons)*

Mom: Looking at me.. *beep beep beep* once again *beep beep beep* Actually after a while of beep beep beeps... (this continues until all the bad words in her dictionary have been used).

Mom: You better run to the nearby grocery and get me few tomatoes, onions, broccoli and blah blah... (the list continues for a few seconds). And if you don't, then u will get no dinner and you will have to sleep on the roads tonight.
*Slams the door *
*Thuddddd*

Me: OK mommy.
(With an evil smile turns towards the road. Wow! that means extra bonus minutes to play in the rain.. Quickly picking up the list and the money pouch.. Runs off to the shop).

Scenario 2.
Now..
(The 2000's)

Me (as mommy): Baby can u please help me get some grocery?

My daughter: Few minutes mom.. I am yet to finish the last level (busy hitting the mobile hard with her little fingers).

Me: Errrr...
(Wait.. If it was my mom would she be so calm? All those beep beep beeps quickly flashed my mind.. Hmmm.. Let me tackle this her way).

Me: (Visualizing my mum whilst gathering up all the strewed courage from every corner of my body)
"See Aara, if you are not gonna listen to me I am gonna kick you off this house and give you no food for 2 days. And also tell your dad about all the mischief you had been up to these days! So.. I'm warning you.. for the last time... You better get off that couch and obey my words.. Now!!!!!!!!!"
Huffff....
(Taking long breaths).

My daughter: *For a second lifts her eyes from the mobile to look at me. With zero reaction again looks back into the screen*

Me: (Whaatttt!! Didn't she hear what I said? Wasn't I significant and consequential? Or did I sound like a mundane monotonous and stodgy television soap that she gave me such a reaction?)

*Door bell rings*

The guy with a cap: "Mam your delivery from big basket"

Me: Errr....
(Before a word slips off my mouth)..

"Chill mom. All your veggies at your doorstep. Happy? By the way I had ordered some mangoes too. Can you make me a milkshake please? I'm hungry", she said and continued her game.

Me : %$&?!

Whether it's the kid "me" or the mommy "me".. It's "ME" who gets to do the job invariably..
Lucky as hell..
Grrrr..

Off to make the milkshake.
Seeya!

PC-Amritha